07 December 2006

Life and How to Live It

Happy birthday, Renae!

This must be the week Miles Davis was thinking about when he came up with Birth of the Cool. Peter Buck’s birthday was yesterday, and today’s the birthday of my oldest and dearest. Keep the toasts hoisted, kids.

I first met Renae toward the end of first grade. Our new home in Vinings was nearly complete, and we were there checking on its progress. Renae’s family lived one street over, and her mom (who went to high school with my mother) brought Renae over to meet me. And we’ve been friends since that spring day in 1966 — forty years of friendship. A fun, lovely, giggly, special friendship.

Not only did our moms go to high school together, but Renae’s maternal grandmother and my maternal grandfather grew up together, too. We were destined for friendship.

Our days as kids were filled with imagination and silliness and walking ‘round and ‘round and ‘round the block. Renae’s house was as unstructured as mine was structured, so we had two different environments for playing (usually her house). We spent one summer obsessed with Sgt. Pepper's. Ah, good times.

My eighth birthday party. That’s Renae in the blue plaid dress.

Let’s face it: We were geeks. We stayed kids as long as we could. And I’m glad we were able to grow up that way.

One Easter season, I guess when we were around ten or eleven, Renae and I were obsessed with the movie The Ten Commandments. We’d act it out in her backyard. The bridge over the creek was the perfect spot for our dancing girls segment (I’d wear my cork-heeled clogs for that number; the cork sounded cool on the wooden bridge). And then there was the “Moses! Moses” Moses!” kiss; we’d pull our arms up and rub elbows as we relived Yvonne de Carlo’s declarations of love and lust for Charlton Heston. We still do the “Moses! Moses! Moses!” kiss when we see each other.


Holly came on board when her family moved to Vinings in the fourth grade. We’ve been a pretty good threesome for a very long time … and they’re lucky that I adore their husbands.

Holly and Renae, in my Little Five Points apartment (Dec. 1986)

As with all long friendships, there were times when we were inseparable and times when we didn’t hang out that much. We ran with different crowds in high school and drifted apart in college, only to come back together with a bang in 1983. Renae had been working and supporting herself for a couple of years, and decided to go back and finish her degree at the University of Georgia. We spent nearly every evening together the summer before she moved to Athens — a summer of great music, great love (it was the summer I fell in love with R.E.M. ), great friendships (I met Simeon through Renae, and Shawn hung out with us a lot that summer, too). And gallons of jug wine.

Holly, Renae, and me (Athens, Dec. 7, 1983)


Renae’s move to Athens was the best thing for me. (Oh, yeah, and she finished her degree and went on to earn a master’s degree at Wisconsin. But enough about her. It’s her birthday, but it’s my memories.) This was the era of a young R.E.M., Art in the Dark, Pylon, this little band called 10,000 Maniacs (a totally different sound back then; you could dance to it!), and other great local bands playing every week. I spent many weekends in Athens, and would even go up for the night to see a show. My flirting with young lads at free R.E.M. shows got us in trouble a couple of times, but it made the story better. And I was glad to be there (literally, there) when things kicked off between Renae and Ron.

Because we’ve been friends for so long, I have a confidence around Renae that I don’t with every person. With Renae, I’ll do just about anything to make her laugh. Well, okay, as I’ve grown older I have that confidence nearly all the time, but it grew thanks to my friendship with Renae.

New Year's Eve 1999


I went with Renae to help her find an apartment in Madison during the summer of 1987. There was a piano bar downtown where you could ing with the piano player — a lovely, older woman who could play 1,001 songs. This was my chance! I went up and sang “Feelings,” dedicating it to Renae and her Athens-based beau at the time. Yes, of course I performed it with a bit o’ the lounge, but I was also serious. The woman loved my performance, so she suggested — and I quickly agreed on — “The Rose.” Fabulous! I was in heaven — all eyes on me, singing my heart out, Renae turning beet-red from laughter. When I returned to the table (chased away by some blond summer-stock reject), Renae noted how sad it was that I’m so at home, alive on stage … and yet I didn’t have a lick of singing talent. True words to be uttered only by someone who loves you.

I was the first in our crowd to meet Greg, back in their grad school days, and he’s still one of my very favorite boys. I love going to visit them, especially the days where we stay in our pajamas until 3 p.m., just talking and laughing and drinking tea.

My first moments with Greg

My first moments with Bopper

Renae and I have been as close as two friends can be since that summer of 1983. Sadly, we haven’t lived in the same state — not even the same damn region — since 1987. One of these days, I’m going to move to the Northeast so that we can hang out all the time like we did that last great summer.

New Year’s Eve 1997

Renae introduced me to and taught me about art. I introduced her to music (pre-Greg) and many wonderful bands. She’s the first one I call about a new beau or a break-up, the one who gets to hear me whine or cheer myself on.

Fun with lights


Renae has become my role model. She’s a professor in Connecticut, and her photography career is now taking off. In fact, she had pieces in shows for a solid year, up until the last month or so — and she has a one-woman show soon in Vermont. Oh, and she ran in the New York Marathon last month.

Renae’s first show (November 2005)


Renae is the best. And I’m glad she’s my best. Happy birthday, Renae!

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17 Comments:

At 12/07/2006 09:38:00 AM, Anonymous HollyC said...

What a great day to celebrate! Renae's Birthday!!!! Remember the birthday parties at Renae's with "dirty" bingo? What fun.
Wish we could all be together today to celebrate, especially after reading Beth's blog. Have a great day Renae!

 
At 12/07/2006 11:06:00 AM, Blogger Marni said...

Happy b-day, Renae!

On another note... Do you still have the Priscilla the Pink Pig doll from the Little Five Points picture? I used to have one of those and LOVED her!

Let's all sing along --- Meeemmmreeees!

 
At 12/07/2006 11:14:00 AM, Anonymous rcofchs said...

Happy Birthday Renea. I wish we all could go out and celibrate tonite, but the drive home from Conn. is too far.

 
At 12/07/2006 11:35:00 AM, Blogger Coffeypot said...

OMG! There's Gina, Jill, Buck and Paige along with the cute little girl with the glasses on the back row. That realy brings back memories of you guys and Vinings. I also remember Renae and Holly, too. It is absolutely wonderful to see how beautiful you girls turned out - regardless of how hard you tried not too. Drunk ass ho!

 
At 12/07/2006 12:39:00 PM, Blogger Old Lady said...

I bet you miss her a lot!

 
At 12/07/2006 03:34:00 PM, Blogger barista brat said...

those pictures are great! it's wonderful that you and renae have remained so close into your adult lives.

btw - do you think the fact that her birthday is a day after mr. buck has any sort of cosmic connection? haha!

 
At 12/07/2006 03:36:00 PM, Blogger Grant Miller said...

Happy Birthday to Renae.

I'm jealous of your 1983 picture in Athens, Georgia. Must have been a fun time to see bands. I will email you w/ that REM bootleg info shortly. I know I said I would before, but I will now.

 
At 12/07/2006 04:32:00 PM, Blogger haahnster said...

Speaking of R.E.M. b**tlegs, I just acquired an ultra-cool show from the UK in 1985...KILLER setlist...I'll email you the details, just in case I've stumbled upon something you might need.

 
At 12/07/2006 06:26:00 PM, Blogger lee said...

beth, I was going to ask which one was you -and it has been answered. There is such good entertainment value in photos like that.Are a couple of those girls twins or sisters, at least?

 
At 12/07/2006 06:43:00 PM, Blogger Beth said...

HOLLYC: How could I forget a Renae party? It was at one of those where I played Spin the Bottle for the first time.

MARNI: I don't think I have the stuffed pig -- but I have an ornament and a T-shirt.

RCOFCHS: I'll take the second leg if you drive the first one.

COFFEYPOT: Who you callin' drunk-ass ho? I was sober most of the time!

 
At 12/07/2006 06:45:00 PM, Blogger Beth said...

OLD LADY: Every damn day. I get up there every year or 18 months, but that's not enough ...

BRAT: It must. I wonder who's birthday it is tomorrow?

GRANT MILLER: It was a great time to have an Athens floor to crash on. Can't wait to see your b**tleg list.

HAAHNSTER: Bring it on, boy.

 
At 12/07/2006 06:48:00 PM, Blogger Beth said...

LEE: The kids in my eighth birthday party photo:

First row: Renae's sister Lisa ... some neighborhood girl (Debbie?)

Middle row: My cousin Jill ... my brother ... Jo Jean Anderson ... Renae ... my sister

Back row: My cousin Gina (not Jill's twin, but her big sister) ... Ellen Black ... the adorable moi, in hat ... and (fittingly) Renae's sister Teresa way off to the side.

 
At 12/07/2006 10:40:00 PM, Blogger Dale said...

Renae's lucky, just like you Beth. Great post and photos, I spotted your glasses before the hat, adorable.

 
At 12/07/2006 11:37:00 PM, Blogger mellowlee said...

Happy Birthday Renae!! *Sniff sniff* Im going to phone my best friend this weekend :)

 
At 12/08/2006 07:42:00 AM, Blogger Bubs said...

That was a really, really nice post. And, just as an aside, I think it's really cool that your parents threw your birthday party at a construction site. I would've loved that as an 8-year old.

 
At 12/11/2006 02:08:00 AM, Blogger Mombi said...

Is she one of the four students mentioned above that had their Christmas ruined by that b*tch teacher?

Huzzah for good friends.

 
At 12/11/2006 11:13:00 AM, Anonymous renae said...

Thanks for all the good memories and all the whacky photos--we've sure had some good times.

love you!

 

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