16 July 2007

Bumper Sticker Du Jour

Spotted on an F150, beautifully balancing the ubiquitous 8 sticker:


Amazing that I’m still single down here in Georgia, ain’t it? Sad thing is, I may have dated him in high school.

That bumper sticker got me in the mood for Mr. Walker — Johnny and Jerry Jeff. Join me on the chorus, why don’tcha?


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26 Comments:

At 7/16/2007 10:17:00 PM, Blogger Allison said...

That is very classy. The word beer should not have anything next to it that rhymes.

 
At 7/16/2007 11:55:00 PM, Anonymous m said...

i never realized that georgia was such a gay state. cool...

 
At 7/16/2007 11:57:00 PM, Anonymous m said...

btw, great song.

e is for eggs...

 
At 7/17/2007 12:34:00 AM, Blogger Johnny Yen said...

"H is for 'Haggard...'"

I love that song.

I read a story my freshman year of college about some redneck confronting him in a bar about the song-- telling him to play the song or he'd beat him up. He realized that he'd get beaten up either way, so he played the song for the guy. And got beaten up.

And I love the red Walker. I know that the black is supposed to be better, but I guess I'm lowbrow.

 
At 7/17/2007 03:43:00 AM, Blogger Moxie said...

I have the bumpersticker for you, my dear:

With Books, REM, and a Good Latte, Who Needs Rednecks?

(You'd still want a few well-read honeys around to rub your feet and feed you bonbons, though. And maybe wash with your gloriously curly hair. Well, that's what I would want, anyway...)

 
At 7/17/2007 03:45:00 AM, Blogger Moxie said...

Dang it, that sentence should have read "And maybe wash your gloriously curly hair." That's what happens when you have too many margaritas with your man...you lose all sense of proper sentence structure.

 
At 7/17/2007 06:38:00 AM, Blogger Beth said...

ALLISON: Ain't it a classic? The guy who made up that bumper sticker probably doesn't know it rhymed.

M: We be red all the way through! (It is a great song, isn't it?)

JOHNNY YEN: I've heard many a great story about JJW fights. You gotta love him.

MOXIE: PERFECT!!! That's what I want, too. That, and too many margaritas.

 
At 7/17/2007 08:09:00 AM, Blogger bigshoulders said...

too funny!
not a bumper sticker per se, but have you seen trucks with [ahem] a "sack" hanging from below the chromed bumper? they tie in nicely with the #8 stickers (with or without the angel wings.)

sheesh. :)

 
At 7/17/2007 09:32:00 AM, Blogger Michael K said...

So which one of these three things does the redneck intend to make love to? This brings to mind a RevCo (I clened up the name in case any kids read yer blog) song entitled "Beers, Steers and Queers".

 
At 7/17/2007 09:47:00 AM, Blogger Coaster Punchman said...

Wow, that's poetic. Did he have the nudie mud flaps too?

 
At 7/17/2007 09:51:00 AM, Blogger Barbara Bruederlin said...

I certainly hope it was a nice BIG pickup truck. You know, to make up for shortcomings elsewhere.

 
At 7/17/2007 09:56:00 AM, Blogger Beth said...

BIG SHOULDERS: Nah, this Southern beauty wasn't sportin' those ... but I've seen plenty of those on trucks. *sigh*

MICHAEL K: That's the song that really came to mind — or Lou Gossett's line from An Officer and a Gentleman — but Jerry Jeff was more appropriate.

COASTER PUNCHMAN: No nudie mud flaps ... dammit.

BARBARA: Very big, very compensating.

 
At 7/17/2007 10:34:00 AM, Blogger Artful Dodger said...

Wow, the first thing that comes to mind is a giant pick-up with giant mud tires, about 6 feet lifted off the ground, with flood lights and a front brush guard and also "No Fear" and "Show Me Your T*ts" bumperstickers as well. And probably a Confedrate Flag somewhere too. Am I far off? Me thinks not. I saw a car that had "Papi Chulo Vivan Aqui" written in that white window marker down the street from my house. Though I think that pales in comparrison.

 
At 7/17/2007 10:47:00 AM, Blogger coffeypot said...

My favorite bumper sticker is: “Careful when passing, driver chews tobacco.” One of my favorite t-shirts is a biker shirt that says, “If you can read this, the bitch fell off.” Ahhhh! Such poetry!

 
At 7/17/2007 11:52:00 AM, Blogger Rhetorically Sterculian said...

I saw a bumper sticker in NYC once:

"What spreads faster than radiation? Jane Fonda"

It was the Seventies, okay.

 
At 7/17/2007 02:23:00 PM, Anonymous bookfraud said...

bumper stickers like that are enough to make one take public transportation.

what i want to know is if the "deer" part is a substitute for women. i mean, you drive your pickup to the woods, down a case of coors, and find a doe in heat.

 
At 7/17/2007 04:55:00 PM, Blogger David Amulet said...

That is the definition of a "catch."

-- david

 
At 7/17/2007 10:16:00 PM, Blogger chelene said...

And people are always telling me I'd be married by year-end if I moved down South. I guess not!

 
At 7/18/2007 06:43:00 AM, Blogger Beth said...

ARTFUL DODGER: I believe he had a Confederate flag ... in his heart. Rednecks come in all states and sizes, don't they?

COFFEYPOT: You could probably write such beautiful poetry and become a millionaire, uncle!

RHETORICALLY STERCULIAN: We love Jane Fonda on this page, so you're on thin ice, buddy.

BOOKFRAUD: The poor deer probably is. What a horrible visual!

DAVID AMULET: Unfortunately, that F150 outran my Beetle.

CHELENE: We got some good'uns down here, girl.

 
At 7/18/2007 12:00:00 PM, Anonymous gifted typist said...

Lucky women, if those boys don't need or want them.

 
At 7/18/2007 05:44:00 PM, Blogger New and Used Records said...

Is it meant to be ironic? That reminds me, I just saw that Jeff Foxworthy has his own line of Beef Jerky.

 
At 7/19/2007 07:09:00 AM, Blogger Beth said...

GIFTED TYPIST: Believe me, I didn't feel a moment of loss when I realized he'd rather love a deer than me.

NEW AND USED RECORDS: Sadly, no. And I saw that JF Beef Jerky. If you were Mr. Foxworthy, would you consider that a career zenith or nadir?

 
At 7/19/2007 10:27:00 AM, Anonymous HollyC said...

I actually clicked and listened to the song, it took me all the way back to TK Hardy's, pitchers of beer and pizza. It was great too because today I had a real a**hole customer come in, just moved here, bitching about people who speak with "twangs" and misprouncing street names like Ponce De Leon, "you know that's really french, right?" what a jerk....

 
At 7/19/2007 10:58:00 AM, Blogger Beth said...

Jerk! "Ponce de Leon" is Spanish, dorkwad.

Doesn't that song take you back to Athens? I never get tired of it ...

 
At 7/20/2007 12:04:00 AM, Blogger jewgirl said...

that is genius. absolutely mothah fuckin' genius. I am howling. on the floor how-ling. I can see their giant ass cracks from here...

 
At 7/22/2007 10:10:00 PM, Blogger thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy said...

Is it a southern thing? Or a small town thing.

'Cause I'm from a small town in the Midwest, and the pickin's were slim (as they say).

 

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