Watch What Happens

Yes, I know; I’m one slack-ass blogger. You can’t imagine the time it takes to be a Bravo star — but I think we left y’all with a good impression of our fine city and our classy, fashionable Southern belles.

Though I haven’t been e-visible lately, I have been leading an interesting life — and at times it has resembled an episode of “The Real Housewives of Atlanta.”

Among the highlights:

• Still thrilled about the Obama win! Still angry about the Prop 8 win; watch for a post for that in the coming days.

• I just bought tix to this to kick off my fiftieth birthday celebration. Any of you New Yorkers up for cocktails in mid-March?

• I finally joined Facebook. Addictive — and it’s so great to see you bloggers from the front! Some cute blogging faces out there.

• There’s a lovely new romance in my life. I can’t think of anything that’s more rejuvenating than the early stages of a new romance. Toes remain curled, giggles erupt regularly. And that’s all I’ll write about that.

Come back to me. Tales to spin! Secrets to spill! A meme to fulfill!

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How I Spent My Summer Vacation

Many of you wrote to check on me during my extended vacation from the blogworld, and for that I’m grateful. However, I’m on too much of a squishy high over my new-friend crush on Coaster Punchman to write an intelligent, interesting post, so instead I’m going to address some of the rumors that swirled during my e-disappearance.

• I did not spend the summer traveling Europe with R.E.M. Dammit.

• I did not steal Peter Buck’s Rickenbacker.

• My looking into that house down the street is not the straw that broke the financial camel’s back. I don't think ...

• I didn’t win the lottery. Dammit.

• I am not the reason why David Duchovny checked into that sex-addict rehab clinic. But he’s going to be in town next month shooting a movie, so maybe I can work in a relapse.

• I am not among the seven people who actually paid to see The Love Guru. I may have been absent, but I still have taste.

• Obama didn’t fist-bump me hard enough to bruise my typing hands. Dammit.

• I did not sneak off to have a baby, although I was spotted walking around with a blanket covering my pudgy midsection.

• I may have stalked Dale. But just a bit.

• I didn’t track down Kid Rock to kick his ass for ruining a perfectly good Warren Zevon song. But I’m considering it.

• I did not knock Noel Gallagher on his bum.

• I didn’t see any concerts, except for Kathy Griffin. Dammit.

I will fill you in what I did during my summer vacation, so check back. Regular posting is back, baby!

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Here I Dreamt I Was Hillary Clinton

My Hillary self was seated in a restaurant near Richard Thomas (star of The Waltons and those Mercedes Benz voiceovers). We chatted and realized we had nothing in common belief-wise, which got us laughing hysterically. Bill was not amused.

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Gone Fishin'

I wish. But I'm going to pretend I'm off having fun while I tackle one rough workload. Coming back in about a week.

Don't forget me!

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Cup's Getting Serious

Things with Favorite Boy are going relatively well. He lives a few states away, but I get to see him regularly. (Not as much as I’d like, of course. Damn fricking long-distance romances.) He’s funny, and kind, and smart, and naughty. We’re having a good time — I want to keep it that way — so I passed a rule that we cannot talk about Where This Is Going until at least the end of this month. I want to enjoy Phase One as long as I can. And, although I'm a girl, I really don't enjoy The Big Talks.

But Favorite Boy broke the rule, bringing up a serious relationship topic the other night, one that kept us talking into the wee hours of the morning.

The topic that broke the rule? Our Freebie Fives.

I love talking about my Freebie Fives. There’s something wonderful about fantasizing and objectifying men. Here’s the problem: Every time I think I’ve settled on those lucky five and head to the card-laminating shop, I think of someone else I wanna get all freebie with.

Help me, kids. Help me anoint the boys worth a throw-down.

Here’s my list so far:

1. Bruce Campbell

2. David Duchovny

3. open slot

4. open slot

5. open slot

Three open slots. And who’s in contention for the coveted three through five? These lovelies (listed alphabetically to avoid jealousies):

Anthony Bourdain
Peter Buck
Michael Chabon
George Clooney
Johnny Depp
Jeffrey Donovan
Colin Firth
Tom Glavine
Hugh Grant
Jon Hamm
John Krazinski
David Letterman
Ewan McGregor
Chris Noth
Keith Olbermann
Clive Owen
Paul Rudd
Nick Simmons

Convince me. Throw some pros and cons on these tasty male-morsels in the comment box.

Who made Favorite Boy’s Freebie Five list? He has three definites — Jennifer Aniston, Liz Phair, and Laura Linney — which make sense, since they look a lot like me.


And, yeah, I think I’m back. Some great stories to tell — including finally checking off one of my Before I Dies last weekend — so come back in the coming days.


Photo credit: The lovely and talented Str8jacket

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A Slack-assed Blogger Fakes a Meme

Yeah, I know. I haven’t been e-round. My recent life has been a circus — professionally and personally — so I haven’t been able to find an hour to write all the posts in my head. Plus, my PC is being rather uncooperative lately. I went three days without e-mail access!

Excuses, excuses.

To get me back in the blogworld, I thought I’d answer this e-mail from my sister on the page. Play along if you wish.

Were you named after anyone?
My mother got the slightly unusual spelling of my first name from the actress Lizabeth Scott, who starred in Loving You with Elvis. My middle name comes from my great-grandmother who raised my mother.

When was the last time you cried?
This morning, after seeing Tim Russert’s son on Today. And ten minutes later over something personal.

Do you like your handwriting?
Somewhat. I like my g and 8, which I copied from the person who most influenced me: Mrs. Barrett, school newspaper advisor and toughest teacher I ever had. I’d love to find her so I could tell her how well I've done with everything she taught me.

What’s your favorite lunch meat?
Very rare roast beef or that pressed turkey in a package.

Do you have kids?
Two cats, one boyfriend, no children

If you were another person, would you be friends with you?
Yep. I’m a lot of fun and I’m loyal to my beloveds. I occasionally rank an eight on the High-maintenance Meter — but what interesting woman doesn't?

Do you use sarcasm a lot?
Definitely; it's my family's language. I had to learn how to dial it back during the Beloved Ex era; who knew sarcasm could be hurtful?

Do you still have your tonsils?
Yep; appendix and virginity, too.

Would you bungee jump?
Absolutely. French and I almost did at a WRAS music festival in 1992, after a great set by the Soup Dragons. We were quite drunk on some alcoholic lemonade, and jumped the bungee way. It closed down as we got to the line, so we missed our chance.

Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Nope. Why waste time on something unnecessary when I could be dancing?

Do you think you’re strong?
Yes. The Beloved Ex says I'm the strongest person he knows. And he'd know.

What’s the first thing you notice about a person?
The eyes. Or her baubles/his height.

Red or pink?
Depends on how it’s used.

What’s your least favorite thing about your body?
The excess junk in my trunk and my too-short legs.

Who do you miss the most?
OM

What color pants and shoes are you wearing?
No pants; I’m wearing a darling green print sundress. The shoes? Adorable two-inch strappy sandals. And you should see the baubles: recycled glass from Coke bottles!

How about your shirt?
Turquoise T-shirt. It looks fabulous with the green print sundress.

What’s the last thing you ate?
Currently munching on a salad while dreaming of cookies.

What are you listening to right now?
R.E.M.’s Accelerate — and getting pumped for this Saturday’s show!

Who’s the last person you spoke to on the phone?
Favorite Boy, late last night

If you were a crayon, which color would you be?
Periwinkle

What’s your favorite smell?
Favorite Boy — because if I can smell him, he’s in town. If he’s three states away at home, then it’s the scent of a spring rain I most enjoy sniffing.

What’s your favorite sport to watch?
Is Project Runway considered a sport? If not, then baseball.

What color is your hair?
Black, with more shoots of gray every year. I’m going for the Susan Sontag/Bride of Frankenstein look.

What color are your eyes?
Hazel — or as I like to describe them, green with freckles.

Do you wear contacts?
Since my freshman year in high school. I am one blind blogger without ‘em. The Beloved Ex used to enjoy taking away my glasses and quizzing me on what I could see (not much, unless I was living in an impressionist universe).

Favorite food?
YES! God, I love food (see: the excess junk in my trunk). Thai’s probably my favorite; Italian is my comfort food.

What’s your favorite cereal?
I tell people Cheerios (especially this time of year because I can put fresh peaches on top) — but it’s really Cap’n Crunch. I haven’t spooned the Cap’n in four or five years, sadly; it's not on the approved Weighty Waddlers list.

What’s your favorite ice cream?
Häagen-Dazs Coffee Heath Bar Crunch (which is hard to find) or Vanilla Swiss Almond (with hot fudge or Magic Shell drenching the top)

Favorite dessert?
Cake or cookies with buttercream frosting

Scary movies or happy endings?
Happy endings. I’m such a wuss over scary movies — unless Bruce Campbell is starring in it.

What’s the last movie you watched?
Bridget Jones’s Diary on Bravo over the weekend. If it’s on, I must watch.

What book are you reading now?
David Sedaris’ new collection, When You Are Engulfed in Flames. Busted out laughing twice while reading it on the bus this morning.

Summer or winter?
I’m really a spring/fall chick. Of the two queried above, I’ll pick winter any day. I hate the heat; I get whiny and bitchy and irritable when the humidity hits.

Hugs or kisses?
Yes … oh, God, yes.

What’s on your mouse pad?
Don’t use one; I surf barebacked.

What did you watch on TV last night?
The neverending Tim Russert coverage on MSNBC. I adored Tim Russert; his death hit me hard.

What’s your favorite sound?
Someone laughing over something I said. Or the opening note of an R.E.M. show.

Rolling Stones or Beatles?
Can’t pick one over the other; they’re both brilliant.

What’s the farthest you’ve been from home?
Europe. Of the countries I’ve visitied, I guess Italy’s the farthest away from Atlanta.

Do you have a special talent?
Yes; just ask Favorite Boy. Seriously, I’m very comfortable talking in front of an audience, and I can also rhyme on a dime and whip up a song parody in no time — family traits I’m proud to possess.

Where were you born?
Right here in Atlanta.

Who do you want to answer these questions?
Every damn one of you!

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On Summer Break

Photo Credit: Favorite Boy

I'll be back next week — relaxed, refreshed, ready to write and read blog posts. I may post a mix tape on Friday, if I'm not sequestered with the jury.

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A Doctor’s Note

Nope, I haven’t run off to stalk Michael Stipe. Nor have I gone all Luddite on you. Or died.

I have blogger’s elbow. My right elbow aches like a mutha-(shut your mouth!) these days, thanks to long hours spent writing in my cubicle. It hurts when I’m in the keyboard position, so I’ve been staying away from Al Gore’s Internet in the evenings.

For those of you who haven't read the entire Cup chronicles, during daylight hours I’m a corporate communicator — which means I write newsletters and annual reports, announcements and posters, reports and presentations, anything that needs to be read by my coworkers. Translation: I write a lot.

Yeah, I know; lame excuse. But at least you get free music every Friday. Watch for my triumphant return to the blogworld — here and in your comment boxes — in the coming days.

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A Bit of a Breather

I won't be posting much this week. My mother is having surgery today, and I'll spend my spare hours at the hospital.

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Maybe You've Noticed

my virtual disappearance during the last week — scant posts, scant visits to your blogs. It's just been one of those weeks. I should be back in a day or two.

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Life Gets in the Way

Don't you hate it when your life gets in the way of blogging? That's where I am this week ... and why I haven't visited your blogs. I have several posts in the works — including a recap of last week's B-52's show (with great pix!) and more answers to Dale's nosiness (again, with great pix!) — but you'll have to wait several more hours.

Now you'll never get to sleep with such blog anticipation, will you?

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Wordy Rappinghood

No, I haven’t been engulfed by Okefenoke wildfires, or run off with the pool boy, or “followed” R.E.M. to Vancouver to take advantage of major stalking opportunities. I’ve just been swamped at work. About 70 percent of my job involves writing, and I’ve written nearly 8,000 corporate words since May 1. I just can’t muster up the energy to blog (or read blogs) when I’m home … which, in itself, is a rarity, as my dance card is filled these days.

I’ve written some great posts … in my head. Too bad y’all can’t peek beyond the wild black locks. Maybe I’ll get them down on keyboard and screen in the next week. Maybe.

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I get a kick out of Jane Fonda. Still damn sexy, and being nearly seventy hasn’t slowed down her flirty li’l self. (Have you seen either of her sizzlin' appearances on “The Colbert Report”? I'd crawl up in his lap, too, if given the opportunity.) Plus, Jane lives in Atlanta, so she gets two more points on the Cup Coolness Chart. (And isn't her haircut adorable?)

Jane hosted the world premiere of her new movie, “Georgia Rule,” in Atlanta last week to benefit her favorite charitable organization, the Georgia Campaign for Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention. During the benefit auction, she bid $100,000 for a weeklong trip to her “favorite ex” Ted’s Argentinean ranch. When she won the trip, she told Turner — and the rest of the crowd at Symphony Hall — “See what I’ll do to keep other people out of your bed?”

Jane’s my flirtin’ hero.

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Have you seen the commercial for some bag o’ nuts, the one that claims when you get that 3 p.m. crash, Robert Goulet comes in and messes with your stuff? Maybe my brain is drained from the recent word output, but I giggle every damn time I see the commercial. I’ve started using Goulet as my excuse at work.

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I believe a couple of you asked for five questions during my latest e-disappearance. Promise I’ll get them to you by Wednesday, if you’re still interested in an interview.

I was in Grant Miller’s dream. I feel special ... and a little dirty ... and I kind of like that feeling. For the sordid details, read the comments to the previous post.

Thanks to those who e-mailed and checked on me. You like me, you really like me!

And now I must sign off to read the backlog of your blogs …

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Let's Try This Again

You know it's bad when you see your blogosphere disappearance mentioned in the comment boxes of other bloggers. You have shamed me thoroughly. I appreciate your recent comments and e-mails and phone calls. To quote Sally Field … okay, I won’t go there.

I. Am. Back.

I’ve missed reading your blogs, and I’ve missed blogging. I thought I was back … but … well … okay, there’s no great excuse. Life just got in the way.

And that life is quite interesting these days. From moving away from the ‘burbs back to my neighborhood ... to some funny move-related mishaps … to two-point-five great concerts so far this year … to Yin and Yang (my biggest distractions of 2007) … well, I have a lot of blog fodder for the week, and I’ll try my damndest to post every day and get back in the routine. And catch up on your blogs.

This time, kids, the bitch really is back.

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The Bitch Is Back!

The move was hellish … the soap opera that is my life bubbled and brewed … but I’m finally back, with lots of stories to tell, including a rave on one of the best shows I’ve seen in ages. Look for regular posting to return.

Loving the new home. Broke it in with a bang the first day of key ownership, and it’s been lovely since. I’m back in my favorite part of Atlanta … a bit closer to work … much closer to the music clubs … surrounded by some cool folks.

Looks like 2007 just might be my year …

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Think of It as a Vacation

I'm in the process of moving. I don't do moving very well, so I won't be blogging for a few days. I'll try to take some breaks and read your entertaining posts, though.

Anyone interested in moving my boxes and boxes of books?

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Five Days off the Radar

I took off several days to recupe and refresh from the long hours I’ve been working since the first of the year. And it was great. Other than an eye-doctor appointment on Thursday, I had no real plans, other than to be self-indulgent. I spent every possible moment outside … saw a great movie (“Thank You for Smoking”) with my favorite ex … enjoyed lunches and dinners in midtown and East Atlanta with friends and family … helped my sister with a yard sale, buying many can’t-live-withouts … and thought about what I want to do with my life. And now I have the blues because I’ll be back at my desk in nine hours.

A Perfect Moment
Driving around Thursday afternoon … beautiful weather … the sunroof open … singing along with “Finest Worksong” … and looking damn cool in those plastic shades from my eye doctor.

Movie Marathon
Did one of my favorite things Sunday night, staying up all night long, watching movies until 5 a.m. I haven’t had a movie marathon in months. Highlights were “A History of Violence,” “Junebug” and “The Squid and the Whale” … “The Ice Harvest” was pretty good … and “Just Like Heaven” was OK (but her San Francisco apartment was fabulous!).

The Next Chapter
I’m seriously considering making a major change in my life — maybe next month, maybe next year. There are a lot of things I have to consider and work out, but hopefully things will come together and I can move to my next life chapter. Sorry to be vague, but I don’t want to mess up by saying too much too soon.

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